in the blink of an eye

in the blink of an eye, everything changes.
in the blnk of an eye, you'll lose everything.
in the blink of an eye. you'll be in the deepest, darkest hell.
i think my eye just blinked.

it started yesterday.
when she said all those words that really pierce like a knife.
it hurts eventhough it has nothing to do with my feelings.
i was blame, and got scolded hard.
then she said, "dont talk to me. "
before i knew it, im no longer her friend.
thats only the so called "appetizer"

then today,
i woke up with frustration.
i was dreaming of sam.
the same dream, that i dreamt about when we were together.
i really love that dream.
then i was woken up by my brother.
for me, i would like to be in that dream.
eventhough it costs my life.

in that dream, im with her.
in that dream, we are unbreakable.
in that dream, nobody can stop us.

is it true that when u love someone, you will forget everything?
based on my experience, i think thats correct.
i was inlove before, and i pour all it out.
in the end, i got disappointed.

currently, i did everything to be friend with everyone,
it suceeded and it fails at the same time.
i helped everyone especially her, and it ends bitterly

i decided that i must bring out that "old" joshua.
wanna know how was THAT joshua.
you'll know tmr.

its kinda cruel but i haveno choice.
im seriously done with her.
i dont want it anymore.
it only causes harm.

FUCK love.
i wil not believe on it anymore.
i just to feel that in my dreams.
nothing else matter.


mataneh

p.s.
just so you know, these feelings taking control of me.
and i cant helped it.
thought you should know, i tried my best to let go of you.
but i dont want to.


run!! dont walk.
i'll fall when u cry.