Living in the world without stranger is not the only thing that scares me; it is also the people that judge me for who I am in this society. I’m used to being hated by everyone or being left out by the majority. It is because I’m just a normal guy who tried so hard but in the end I will be stuck in my make-believe-world where I can do anything without feeling anything. Questions pop out of my head… would you be happy if I just close my eyes and stay in my own world without anyone bothering you? Or is it just another dream that will never come true?

It is because your love is the only one that fills my soul and made me feel special just once in my life. It’s not much but I can call it my greatest accomplishment. It’s only up to you if u will give me a chance to pull myself together and be decent just for a while. Well maybe until the pills slide down my throat and pulls the trigger in my hand...

Blood will start gushing out of my head and I will leave this place in a decent death. I will carry this hope; hope that we will be together even though life is setting us apart. I will be always waiting; waiting for the time we will have that voice which will make our fantasies will come true. I will carry you to the altar even though I’m just a part of the soil which cannot be resurrected.

Can u live without me?? I just need an antidote for this illness that won’t be cure. It’s my fault for having these diseases, but all we need is a reason to live. Reasons to live and to wake up everyday, to whatever we want to do…

This day is belonging to my tears and heartaches. We are not gonna make it if you stick with me... But tomorrow will come and I am not afraid to lose you because we can still meet each other to the other side of life

Sorry for my English, what can I say failure is my brother..

my life is not that perfect but i love the way the things r arrange

nd i wont change it eventhough it will lead to some probelms that icanteven solve..

donuts weird facts..

"A doughnut, or donut, is a sweet, deep-fried piece of dough or batter. The two most common types are the torus-shaped ring doughnut and the filled doughnut, a flattened sphere injected with jam, jelly, cream, custard, or another sweet filling. A small spherical piece of dough, originally made from the middle of a ring doughnut, may be cooked as a doughnut hole. A doughnut also looks similar to a bagel, which uses the same shape as a ring donut."

cut the crap..
donuts is another pastry..
its sweet nd heavenly..

when i see donuts
i can remember things..

like the movie "the simpson"
it is because homer simpson loves donuts..
he was like "donuts are the essential parts of my life!!"
nd "look at me!! i have donut boobs.."
hes weird..
hes a suicidal bastard..
there is this part of the movie when he tried to climb the giant fishbowl..
he was given a choice between a jet pack and a super glue..
nd wat a suprise he chooses the super glue and said
"no pain no gain.."
he starts putting super glue on his hand and he starts to climb up
with every step he make he needs to peel off the part of his skin nd move on to a next step..
i was laughing like a mad cow when i see that part..

another thing i remember is peter griffin
from the sitcom the family guy..
he also likes to donuts..
he once ate bart simpson, his son..
coz he tot that hes a walking donut woth sprinkle on top..
haha!!
"why cant you just be a good donut and slide down my throat.."
"no dad, im not a donut.. you f*ckin' bastard.."

last thing is my darling..
shes part of the CARBOHYDRATE family..
she is named donut for she likes to eat donut..
currently i been missing her for like 4 days
she attends the leadership camps..
im happy for her coz i can see that she enjoyed the camp..

i love her !!
thats all people..
thats the crap of the night..
i love my mrs donut!!

i mean CASSANDRA!!
peace out
*wipe out*

whoa!! slow day..

today is a slow day..

i dont know why??

well im doing maths..

nd im not a maths freak!!

so mid year is over..

time to reveal the marks..

firstly maths..

i got 79% for the paper two

so disappointing..

den 69% for the paper one..

so poor!!
den total is 74% ahhmmm its not to expectation..

my first A2 for the examination...

English..

i got 62% for paper one
fucked up man!!

den 60% for paper two..

even worse..

total is 61% again, not to expectation..

i failed to reach mrs ruby's expextation..

b4 aiyo!!

dnt

this paper has the most suprising result..

me and neny only pass the overall..

but still im not happy because i only got 67%

b3

principles of accounts

i got 61%

somethings wrong with me..

last year i got a1's all the way..

now i got b4
damn!!

combined humanities..

geography 60% well its not

disappointing coz i never study for this test..

haha!! sorry gorrilla-valerie
den social studies 60%

ahhh i finally passed my social studies..

total is 60% (obviously)
b4 again..

lastly, science
physics is 77%

below mr goh's standard but its ok..

chemistry.. 73%

ahhmmm mr lee's comment was "only steady mark"

combine is 75%

haha!! a1 but its very low a1

well i still appreciate it..

l1r5 is 18 points
nd lir4 is 14 points..

so low!!

i cannot live my dream of going to jc..
haha!! nvm i still got polythecnic..

pictures!!

this was take by shiyi!!

the right brainer of the 4e2

she describes this as the top notchers..

haha! i was in the far right..

we r the top scorer in chemistry.. haha

melvin (far left) first 80 plus percent..

me (far right) second 73 %

den linsay (center)

she is also known as the maths freak

she got 72% i think...

thats all

cheers..

types of boyfriends and girlfriends

here r my some classification of boyfriends
are you one of them??

9 TYPES OF BOYFRIENDS:

Joe Sensitive - "After I wash the dishes, let's cuddle, OK?"
Also known as: Mr. Nice Guy, Family man, Honey, Darling, Soft-boiled Egg, Snugglepup
Advantages: Well-behaved; irons own shirts Disadvantages: Irritatingly compassionate, wimpy

Old Man Grumpus - "People are stupid. The world can go to hell. Let's stay home and watch TV."
Also known as: Grumbles, Sour puss, Stick-in-the-mud, Old Fogey, Slow Mover, Jerk
Advantages: Stays put; predictable
Disadvantages: Royal pain in the ass

Flinchy - "I--I'm sorry for whatever it was I did."
Also known as: Trembly, Creampuff, Hey you
Advantages: Jumps entertainingly when startled
Disadvantages: Easily spooked; surrenders without a struggle

Bigfoot - "Shut yer trap, I'm thinkin'."
Also known as: Chunk-style, Lummox, Ignoramus, Galoot, the Hulk, Big 'n' Dumb
Advantages: Can tote bales; is easily fooled
Disadvantages: Can break you in half, sweats like a pig

Lazybones - "Zzzzzz"
Also known as: Lucky Dog, Parasite, Bum, Sponge, Snoozebucket, Drug Addict Advantages: Well rested; easy target
Disadvantages: Unlikely to fulfull your dreams

The Sneak - "Who, me?"
Also known as: Love Pirate, Snake, Rat, Slime, G-D Son of a Bitch
Advantages: May feel pangs of guilt
Disadvantages: May be having time of his life

Ace of Hearts - "After I wash the dishes let's make love like crazed weasels, OK?" Also known as: The Sizzler, Handyman, Dreamboat, Casanova, Monster Advantages: Perpetually aroused
Disadvantages: Perpetually aroused

The Dreamer - "Someday I'm going to be rich and famous. I don't know how, but--"
Also known as: Struggling artist, Philosopher, Buffoon, Bag of Wind, Fool Advantages: Tells good stories
Disadvantages: Will turn into "Old Man Grumpus"

Mr. Right - "While the servants wash the dishes, let's make love like crazed weasels in my new yacht, ok?"
Also known as: Mr. Perfect, Jim Dandy
Advantages: Answer to a woman's prayer
Disadvantages: Hunted to extinction

now the girlfriends...

9 TYPES OF GIRLFRIENDS:

Ms. Nice Guy "Tickets to the boxing match? Oh, darling, you shouldn't have!" Also known as: Whattagal, Precious, one of the boys, My Main Squeeze, Doormat
Advantages: Cheerful, agreeable, kindly
Disadvantages: May wise up someday

Old Yeller "You G-D spineless good-for-nothing drag-ass no-talent son of a bitch! Can't you see you're making me miserable??"
Also known as: She-Devil, Sourpuss, the Nag, My Old Lady, Warthog from Hell Advantages: Pays attention to you
Disadvantages: Screeches, throws frying pans

Sickly "Oh, my head. My head. My feet. My cramps. My cellulite."
Also known as: Whiner, Mewler, Grumpy
Advantages: Predictable
Disadvantages: Contagious

The Bosser "Stand up straight. Put on a different tie. Get a haircut. Change your job. Make some money. Don't give me that look."
Also known as: Whipcracker, The Sarge, Ms. Know-it-all, Ball and Chain, Yes Mom
Advantages: Often right
Disadvantages: Often right, but so what?

Ms. Vaguely Dissatisfied "I just can't decide. Should I switch my career, goals, home, and hair color?"
Also known as: The Fretter, Worrywart, Typical, Aw C'mon Honey
Advantages: Easily soothed
Disadvantages: Even more easily perturbed

Wild Woman out of Control "I've got an idea. Lez get drunk an' make love onna front lawn. I done it before. S'fun."
Also known as: Fast Girl, Freewheeler, Goodtime Charleena, Passed Out Advantages: More fun than a barrel of monkeys
Disadvantages: Unreliable; drives off cliffs

Huffy "I see nothing humorous in those silly cartoons you keep snickering at." Also known as: No Fun, Humorless Prig, Cold fish, Chilly Proposition, Iceberg, Snarly
Advantages: Your friends will feel sorry for you
Disadvantages: You will have no friends

Woman from Mars "I believe this interpretive dance will explain how I feel about our relationship."
Also known as: The Babbler, Spooky Girl, Screwball, Loony, Bad News, Artistic Advantages: Entertaining, unfathomable
Disadvantages: Will read her poetry aloud

Ms. Dreamgirl "I am utterly content with you just the way you are, my handsome genius of a boyfriend. I think we must make love like crazed weasels now!"
Also known as: Ms. Right, Goddess, Knockout, Perfection, Gorgeous Advantages: Funny, intelligent, uninhibited
Disadvantages: Will have nothing to do with you

ok thats all
cheers..

the turning point of my elbow??

sports day..

BORING!!

go EVEREST!!

we ditch that boring event

loking forward for my detention haha!!

mothertounge period..
my FREE PERIOD!!

haha 3 hours straight..

i will be doing our class book..

coolness!! im the head editor!!
im doing the front page design and i hope it will turn out just nice..

ben 10

im addicted to heri's games...

i will ask for it next week..

during my FREE PERIOD!!

from the effect of next week i will have 3 hours straight of FREE PERIOD!!

haha goodluck to my classmates..

ahhmm yesturday..

my friend kathylyn..

came here from moscow to visit me..

so cool lah!!

people!! correction.. shes a tomboy..

we went to skatepark

and saw that fucking steve..

he challenged me to do this trick..

then suddenly i dropped off the ramp and broke my right elbow...

fucking painful leh!!

nvm.. pics!!

here is the pic kathylyn..

shes the second from right..

sorry guys she dont want any by at the moment..

haha!! too bad..

luckily i got my mrs donut!!!

i love you dar..

ok thats all for now..

bye dudes and duddats..

peace out..

most awaited post..

ok people this post will be the crappiest post ever..

haha.. im hyper today..

after 2.5 hours of english and almost 3 hours waiting for dar..

still hyper i dont know y..

maybe shes my strength..

shes already my inspiration..

drama will be super nice

with the collisions of performing arts group!!

ahhhmm am i horny?? haha!!

so random..

im a pure minded ok!!

haha maybe its time for a change...

but still i will preserve my wholesome image!!

*crap*

i love my mrs donut!!

i dont want to lose her..

i rather lose my feet if i cant be with her..

pictures!!!

my wish list!!

plz take note of the 6th dash..

that will be one of my greatest accomplisment..

haha

cheers!!

wipe out!

jamming session..

hey all

today is a very fine day

i ate vegetarian food with a lil bit of bacon

haha ms swan

we went jamming at tiet studio

its damn funn

i was high nd very hyper

im yours

too bad my darling didnt come

she got a father daughter bonding

Anyway

we played 23 songs

including our three original composition

my songs r retarded

its like a country song with a lil bit of emoish accent

but i like my songs

this r like the pages from the book of my brain

get it

we played yellow

nd i became a vocalist

YELLOW

i love that boring song

at the end of the day

im freaking tired

nd thirsty

i was like craving for coconut juice

i dont know y

anyway pictures

this was taken during the speech day..

i look retarded..

i was praying so hard..

so that i wont make any mistakes..

cool pic huh??

we r the wanted with the a lil bit of terin..

cheers!!

i love you dar...

i miss you too..

hey people..

im sorry!..

mirrabelle sorry!

i didnt mean that way..

im so stupid!

so this is my side of story..

i didnt mean that they r immature..

im just ashamed coz im hanging out with you guys..

instead of people with the same age as mine..

i feel like the walking parental consent..

bcoz im too old for some jokes..

im not laughing at some of ur jokes..

coz sometimes im thinking..

or its not funny for me..

to be frank..

i wanted to laugh but when i laugh i will go haywire..

i cant control myself..

so im just pretending to be numb and be quiet..

i got only one chance with her and i dont want to blow it..

bcoz she means a lot to me..

if i do this kind of things,.

you all might think that im not acting my own age..

well all of my friend thinks that i dont act my age..

im sorry for the hurt i caused

i will take all the blame

nd mirabelle thank you..

for all the things youve done...

nd please dont avoid me or ur friends...

if you want please talk to me..

if you want u can shout at me..

straight to my face..

hey dar happy monthsary

thank you for being with me for the entire month

i love you!!

hello people..

im here again...

talking crap about life...

ok LIFE..

life is nothing without love..

but love is not the only thing that revolves in your life...

but when you have that certain feeling...

a feeling that fills ur entire body..

u can let go.. or hold unto it..

but when you hold unto it..

how can you manage it on ur own..

if you hold it tightly, love will die..

if you hold it lightly, love will fly..

how should you hold it??..

how do you know if ur still keeping love or ur letting go??.

another definition of love is..

LOVE is a disadvantage..

of course it will drive you

crazy..

mad..

jealous..

and sad.

it causes sleepless nights. it eve breaks your heart...

now come to think of it..

"is it healthy to fall in love??"

LOVE for a friend..

what counts the most in your life is not "WHAT" you have..

its "WHO" you have..

just be thankful dat they r part of ur life..

LOVE for ur dead loveones..

i know losing the one you love hurts..

some people say " you get over it easily!!"

"you can do it!!"

but it really isnt easy..

especially when that love was the only love you ever wanted...

LOVE for ur partner..

if everyone turns you down you got hurt and u cant help but cry...

hold back!! take it easy..

listen to the love of ur life..

coz he is willing to catch all the pain

just to see u smile again...

this pictures is the greatest love ive felt in my whole "singapore days"

but i know more will come and i will cheerish them all...

so bottomline..

when you LOVE you dont need to change yourself to be accepted!!..
as long as you can adjust with the relation.. its enough!!
your just a human being.. if youre not appreciated then they dont know wat they are missing...

peace out..
keep loving one another..
coz it may ran out..

yah im superman but i cant be your man..

wat in the hell is wrong with me?!?!

have i lost my touch or im just being rusty?..

can anybody telll me wats wrong me?..

bujangs 11 2007

how i wish to get back those smiles..

smiles of being happy go lucky...

freaky de ja` vu

this was told by a student from the unknown school somewhere in the world.

it is a diary entry and its very creepy..

dec 19, 1647

dear diary,

after a nice day yesturday, which is "mickie's b-day", theres a really bad news..

a really really bad news...

december 19 is supposed to be a study camp jamborette, its like a camp for a week.

some one sms me in the middle of the afternoon.

it says:

"good morning, peter this may shocked you but its better if i tell you earlier..

12 of your classmate went to a jamborette they are accompanied by mdm. greystoke..

they were in the bus then the bus drifted and slide down the valley..

we havent confirmed if any of you classmate survive but we will keep in touch...

take it easy man.."

i was so shocked and become very strength less..

i was in a great....

that was the last entry on his diary and its not even finish

the creepy thing is i experienced the same fate as peter..

im not lying if you want to know more ask one of my classmate...

12 of my classmate died in the same fate...

i cant explain wat happen..

but its true

i was frustrated and i just search in the internet whole day

i searched about accidents that shook the world..

then suddenly this pop out msg just caught my attention..

it was a about peter slovalski and a group of his classmate died in a tragic accident...

moving on...

i dont want to recall any happenings..

now picture discussion...

this the photo of my classmates..

the blur faces from the back of the pic are those who died in the accident..

plus the guy infront in black t-shirt...

this pic was taken during my birthday december 11 2007

few days before the accident...

well past is past so y bother..

ahhhmmm something to TALK about

here am I

doing nothing for the first time

i just finish mugging my physics paper

nd i dont bother to revise for maths

coz if u r consistently failing y bother??

nvm i was playing guitar all day..

i was making a new song and eventually i made a nice song

but i only made the chorus so its still suck!!

it was named "this is how u saved me"

thanks to pat-rice...

nd the genre is gospel.,.

tribute to lakewood and to hillsong...

well another day without my dad

hes in qatar right now...

i miss him a lot..
i dont have someone to talk to and nobody is backing me up

when im involve in a fight with my mom haha!!!

nvm three more months i can still make it...

ahhmmm few more days to monthsary and im all alone in that day,..

well at least shes happy...

its not dat it will be our last monthsary...

this love wont break nd will stand..*CRAP*

ahhmmm next topic is...

ahmmmm... ahh...

now im watching the number 23

its weird bcoz theres this one time

when we play the mind game..

the pupose of this game is to pass messages through our mind..

i was ask to send any number msg to keane shiyi li ping,,

then after 5 mins we scream the number out...

unexpectedly it was the number 23!!

creepy...

now picture discussion..

this was taken during the speech day prize giving ..
ky me and the small guy named jeremy??(i think so)

sorry if im not sure who is the last guy..

well we were trying to pose small medium and large but it turned out to be

a stupid one of a kind picture...

y??

it is because i wasnt smiling that day..

and im pretty sure im not looking to the camera..

freaky..

one last thing..

to the people who tagged me..

thank you nd i promise to tagged you back...

that is y i hate putting tag board on my profile..

nvm nd i miss my girl also my niece...

i love you dar!!!

nd i already told my dad about us..

nd suprisingly he said "so?!?!"

haha

thats all folks

keep rocking!!

like pope!! haha

random songs from my head

i was bored during POA midyear exam

so i wrote this stupid song

i havent put the melody..

dedicated to all young lover..

may you all have a happy ending..

I CAN BE YOUR SUPERMAN
By MOZAKZ

There was at time
When the space is dry with mime
One man stands still

For what he believes is real

On the other part of the world
There I was lame and bored
Staring in a blank space
Just to imagine that she will be engrave

She’s the girl of my dream
But I can only drool and scream
Scream then I will be seen
In this worthless days in my dreams

I can be your superman
With the strength of three little men
Just to see your lovely smile
I will do anything, even fly

Now that I am with you
Let our love be true
I can call you my wonderwoman
Coz you’re the one that desired by man

Please know that I love you babe
But are we on the same stage?
We can’t deny our feelings
So let’s be true and start believing

Believing that love is forever
Believing that I’m true and with you whenever
I can assure you, you won’t be sorry
So let’s start our little comic love story